Opposites. We learn this concept in kindergarten. The opposite of up is down, the opposite of left is right, and the opposite of forwards is backwards.
What if I asked you about love. What is the opposite of love? For most, hate is what comes to mind. Seems to make sense, the opposite of like is dislike so it’s only natural that pattern follows suit on a grander scale for love vs. hate.
But not anymore, not even in the slightest.
You see, to hate something means you have to devote energy to the idea. You must think about it, agonize over it, and be bothered by it. I used to question my husband on why his Ex’s insults and actions never got to him. “I don’t know,” he’d say. “They just don’t. I don’t care what she says or does. I do not give her a place of value in my head or heart.”
Interesting, I thought. When people divorce, where does the love go? I used to think it transformed into hate, and for some, it does. These people live a life full of hatred and anger.
For the lucky ones, the love once felt for their former spouse does not transform. It simply disappears. It becomes a hazy fog drifting away until one day the sun shines so bright it vanishes, never to be seen or thought of again.
Observing the way exes interact has now changed my definition. The opposite of love is no longer hate. It is indifference.
He is indifferent to her actions and behaviors. He reserves his emotions for his friends and family, to those that matter to him and his life. He literally has turned off his ability to feel for her, and it is because of this that I think he is able to lead such a happy life. If you don’t let it bother you, you can’t feel hate. And blocking out hate is always a good thing.