其实雅思小作文很简单:主体段4

发表于:2014-06-18 16:43 [只看楼主] [划词开启]

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四、主体段开篇写法
主体段开篇是写好主体段的核心,根据笔者多年的教学经验,发现主体段开篇可以分为三种思路。所谓开篇,并不是单指第一句话,而是最初的第一个到第三个句子的写法,正确写好了开篇,对于后面的写作是非常有帮助的,下面我们来系统地看一下具体写法:

1. 起始点
起始点主要运用于动态数据图表,它包含2种写作思路,第一种是描写数据大小,用词组stand at来写,以时间状语开始,主语为表示数据的名词:
1). In 1997, the number of new UK graduates stood at approximately 20000.
但是当起始点为2个以上数据时,我们就要先写最大的那个数据,然后再将其和另外的数据进行对比:

2). In 1960, the proportion of population aged 15-46 stood at 65 percent, compared to 30 percent and 5 percent of other two age groups.

或者我们还可以根据前面章节提到的准备知识点中的处理静态数据的句型来写:
3). In 1960, the proportion of population aged 15-46 stood at 65 percent. By comparison, the percentages of other two age groups were 30 percent and 5 percent respectively.

起始点的另外一种写法称为:“起点表象意义”,它必须结合数据的实际含义来写,比如上述 的2个题目,第一个起点的“表象意义”为在1997年总共有2万名大学生从大学毕业,我们只需用一个简单句将这个意思写出来即可:
4). In 1997, a total of 20000 new graduates graduated from UK universities.

而第2个题目的起点“表象意义”就比较复杂了,它可以从2个角度来说,一是在1960年时大约有65%的日本人口在15到46这个年龄段里;另外一个意思可以是1960年时15到46岁的年龄段的人口占了日本总人口的65%。这2个意思其实都非常不错,但是在转换成英文的时候就会使用到前面章节中的2个准备知识点,一是表示占据的动词,二是百分比作主语时的学术转换:
5). In 1960, the 15-46 age group constituted 65 percent of the Japanese population./ In 1960, slightly below two thirds of the Japanese population were in the 15-46 age group.

 

6). In 1961, only slightly over one third of the British families owned one car.
7). In 1961, most British families did not own cars, with only around 35 percent owning one car.
而另外2个数据的写法和第一种里的是一致的,区别主要在第一个数据的表达上。根据朗阁http://www.longre.com/诸老师的经验,起点“表象意义”写法其实是有一定的写作套路的,通过下面几个例子大家可以逐渐熟悉并掌握这些套路:
8). In 1950, a total of 20 million barrels of oil were discovered worldwide.

 

9). In 1962, around 20000 people became UK citizens.
10). In 1950, a total of 25000 science fiction books were loaned. By comparison, the figures of other two categories were only 5000 and 3000 respectively.

 

11). In 1911, there were a total of 25000 male prisoners in this country, compared to only 4500 female prisoners. 在这句话的写法基础上,我们还可以通过倍数关系的描写来引导出女性囚犯的数量,具体写法可参考前面章节中的准备知识点。

2. 最大值
最大值的写法既适用于动态数据图表,也可以运用于静态图表,所有的最大值都是以其数据“表象意义”为主,和起始点表象意义相对比较广比较多不同的是最大值表象意义的意思概括相对很有套路,一般可以从以下几个思路入手:最受欢迎;最主要的原因;最大的开销类别;最高级。在引导这些最大值的时候,我们一般也可以加入一些句型结构来使其句型更复杂。这类句型主要以名词性从句为主,比如:It is clear that; It is noticeable that; The most significant feature is that;

 

1). It is clear that the percentage of lectures with PHD qualification is the highest at college C, at 60 percent. By comparison, the proportions of college A and college B are 45 percent and 35 percent respectively.

 

2). It is noticeable that the percentage of persons under 18 years old was the highest in Utah, at 32.2 percent. By comparison, the proportions of other two states were 27.3 percent and 22.8 percent respectively.
如果用最高级写的话还有另外一种方法:
3). It is noticeable that nearly one third of the residents in Utah were under 18 years old, which was the highest among the three states.

 

4). It is noticeable that TV obtained the highest popularity among the general population. A total of 4hrs 28min was spent on watching TV, which accounted for over half of the total hours.
“最受欢迎”的写法除了我们常用的be the most popular以外,还可以参考上述例子中的obtain/gain the highest popularity的写法,灵活使用简单句来表达相同的意思。

 

5). The most significant feature is that commerce was the most popular sector for the young people among all the industries. In 1990, it recruited nearly 30 percent of the young employees, which rose sharply to around 38 percent in 2000.
这是个动态数据图表,除了描写最大值的“表象意义”外,我们还要继续将数据的动态变化描写出来,这时候,我们也要注意结合数据实际含义使用一些合理的动词,比如上述例子中recruit一词的用法就很灵活,我们还可以用hire等意思相近的词替换。

 

6). The most significant feature is that air travel was the most popular type of transport for the Japanese visitors who traveled to New Zealand, with nearly 90 percent of them choosing this mode.
在这句话中,我们要注意作者对于最大值数据大小的描述方式,即用介宾短语。相似的写法我们再来看一个例子:

 

7). The most significant feature is that football obtained the highest popularity among the Australian boys, with the participation rate in playing football reaching 20 percent. This is in stark contrast with the figure of girls, at only 2 percent.
在这个例子中,我们表述完最大值后可以根据题目的数据关系将最小值与其进行对比,这样的效果更佳。

 

8). The most significant feature is that the number of Internet connection was the largest in South Korea. In 2001, over 15 out of 1000 people had access to the Internet and this figure rose quickly to almost 25 per 1000 people in 2002.

 

9). It is noticeable that over-cultivation is the leading cause of land degradation in North America, which is responsible for over half of its degraded land.
在这个题目最大值的表述中,比重最大的那个数据背后的含义可以用最主要的原因来写,结合数据的大小就有了上述的写法,后面那句定语从句的使用在静态数据中经常用来替换介宾短语。

 

10). It is clear that sending and receiving emails is the main reason for people who use the Internet, with the percentages of all the age groups being at around 39 percent respectively.
在这个表格数据最大值的表象意义描述中,我们一定要注意用“收发电子邮件”来作为主语,而千万不要只用电子邮件作为主语,所以在平时的训练中我们要注意对于一些常见含义的总结,以求在考场中根据当时的数据迅速做出判断。

 

 

11). The most significant feature is that teachers' pay was the biggest category of spending for this university. In 1981, it accounted for 40 percent of the total expenditure, which shot up to 55 percent in 1991.
这又是一个非常重要的最大值表象意义的写法思路,最大的开销类别,除了用category以外,还可以使用item,而开销或支出还能用outlay来替换。由于是动态数据,所以可以按照前面一个例子的句型使用定语从句来表述。

 

12). It is clear that the growth rate was the quickest in the annual salary of the fire fighter. When they started working, they could earn a yearly income of 20000 pounds, but this rose rapidly to around 27000 pounds three years.
这是按照幅度最大描写的一个经典实例,在描写动态变化时,诸老师并没有采用前面几个例子中的定语从句,而是用but连接一个简单句表述,大家不妨可以思考下其中的缘由。

 

 

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